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What's going on with me lately?
Pessimism striked me once again. Lack of confidence, low self-esteem.
Guess my will-power is just not strong enough. One of my teammates used to say this "it's all in the mind". I tried using this method to pyscho myself that I look alright, must be confident of myself.. etc.. Like I said, my will-power aint strong enough.
Lately, I've been watching this drama "1 litre of tears". Even guys who had watched the show cried. It was based on true story relating a 15 years old ger who suffered from a incurable spine disease (dunnoe the full term). In spite of the many discriminating looks from people, she continued to live her life as it was b4 she had the disease(e.g going school, helping out at her dad's tofu store.. ). She was strong.
If I were in her shoes, I would just have ended my life. Yet, she pressed on.
Life isnt just about the big 2 letters word "ME". Life can easily ended but what abt your loved ones who are still living? How upset they would be? Maybe tt was one of the reasons why she pressed on.
I need to be strong. Physically and mentally. Words are cheap though.
Anyway, I am not thinking abt committing suicide la... Hahaa. Just that recently, nothing seems to excite me.. I aint looking forward to anythin.. In other words, I am simply a boring person lately...
Perhaps, retail therapy might help to a certain extent. Or maybe not.
Argh...Labels: Life, weight
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